From grey to colour – my journey through burnout and back
There was a time when I woke up every morning feeling like I was moving through fog. Everything looked fine on the outside, but inside, I felt grey. I’d lost my sparkle, my energy, and my sense of who I was.
I remember sitting at my desk one morning, staring at my to-do list, and feeling absolutely nothing. No excitement, no motivation, just a dull ache of exhaustion. I told myself to push through, to keep going, because that’s what I’d always done. But I was miserable.
The Slow Fade into Burnout
Burnout doesn’t arrive with flashing lights. It creeps in quietly. It starts with saying yes when you want to say no, skipping rest because there’s “too much to do,” and convincing yourself that slowing down means falling behind. For me, it looked like endless late nights, constant pressure to perform, and a growing sense of disconnection from the things that once brought me joy. I was achieving, but I wasn’t living.
If you’ve ever felt that way, you’re not alone. So many of us reach a point where we’ve given so much that there’s nothing left in the tank.
The Moment Everything Shifted
My turning point was when my body said “no”. I wasn’t being given a choice - my body just shut down. I was a mess and I didn’t know what the way forward looked like. To burnout and breakdown was a devastating experience for me, full of shame, embarrassment, despair. I had always been the person who could do it all….until, I wasn’t anymore. Who was I now?
That day, I made a quiet promise to myself: to stop running on empty and start listening to what my body and mind were trying to tell me.
The Gentle Climb Back
Healing didn’t happen overnight. It started with small, almost invisible steps. And one thing that helped me personally was getting a coach. Through my own raw, emotional, coaching conversations I was able to find my own way forward in a way that felt sustainable to me. In practice, that looked like taking short morning walks, just to breathe and notice the world again.
I started journaling, even if it was only a few lines about how I felt.
I said no to things that drained me, even when it felt uncomfortable.
Slowly, the colour began to return. I started to feel moments of joy again, tiny sparks of energy that reminded me of who I was before the burnout. And I built my life around the word “balance” - it was what anchored everything I now wanted.
What I Learned Along the Way
Rest isn’t failure. It’s the foundation for everything else.
It’s an age old saying, but you can’t pour from an empty cup. Giving yourself permission to pause is an act of strength, not weakness.
Healing is not linear. Some days you’ll feel amazing, others not so much. That’s okay. One step at a time, that’s all we need.
A Reflection for You
If you’re in that grey space right now, take a deep breath. You don’t have to fix everything today. Just start with one small act of kindness towards yourself.
Ask yourself:
What do I need most right now?
What would it look like to give myself permission to rest?
What’s one small thing that could bring a little colour back into my day?
Your Next Step
You don’t have to stay in the grey. You can find your colour again, one gentle step at a time.
